Bee burps!

So bathed checked out milia I have on my face to see if it's getting any better. Lie back on bed to see a big hairy spider. Now my normal reaction is 'arrrrrgggggggggggggg' followed by running to my mothers house. But no I surprised myself and I was cool, ah it's just a spider. I'm thinking to myself what the hell is wrong with me I'm supposed to be scared.

So I get the vacuum turn it on suck it up. It was dead already. Now the adrenalin or what ever it was keeping me sane has left. I'm shaking and the vacuum nozzle is lodged in the bath just in case it was asleep and it escapes. OMG it was right above my head what if it crawled across my skin while I was asleep? I wonder if the little bastard was the reason I get the inexplainable bumps???

A penis says to his balls 'right lads, get ready and I'll take you to a party' the balls reply 'you fucking liar you always go inside and leave us knocking.'